Lolita

Lolita was written and published in 1955 by Vladimir Nabokov. It is possibly one of those most fascinating books I have ever read. However, despite the perfectly written text, which I would find very easy to read under any other circumstance, I'm still forcing myself to get through Nabokov's novel. We were told the subject matter wasn't meant to be pleasant, and that it would make us uneasy. I had no idea how bad this would be, until I started reading. Usually, I have no problem reading books that the K-12 school system has banned. In this case, I could barely read, or listen to the audiobook, as I did try both, without feeling sick to my stomach.

Lolita is about a man named Humbert Humbert, who is sexually obsessed with young girls around 12 or 13 years old, whom he refers to as "nymphetes". The novel is supposed to be an account of his life that he writes in prison, and is told in first person. Humbert is one of the most unreliable narrators I have ever experienced, though he reminds me somewhat of Holden Caulfield in Catcher in the Rye. The beautiful way he writes is meant to convince his audience that this could be a love story, and is also meant to make such an ugly subject palatable. To a point, I could almost buy these things. There were times, though not many, when I would look at what I was reading and think that he truly cared for Lo. He often said he loved her. For example, at one point he specifically says: “It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.” But then, the true perverted nature of Humbert's thoughts would come out again, and I would need to put the book aside for a while.

Lolita, or Dolores, is 12 years old when she's introduced. From the start, it's clear that Humbert does not love her so much as he loves what she is. She embodies everything that he personally finds appealing in a nymphete. Lo is just beginning to reach puberty, and I think that is why she toys with Humbert and allows his flirtings and touches the way she does. To her, or, according to Humbert's view of Lo, she simply finds him to be an attractive, older man, like a Hollywood star. However, because this is Humbert's writing, I couldn't trust this at all. Humbert stays with Lo and her mother, Ms Haze, in their house, renting one of their rooms. I have just reached the part where Ms Haze has told Humbert that she is madly in love with him, right after Lo has left for camp. The details leading up to this section, particularly when Humbert licked Lo's eye, and when he later satisfied himself with Lo's legs across his lap, left me feeling nauseous. I will try to finish this novel, because I do think it is incredibly well written, as well as an extremely important literary work, but I can't say I enjoy it much at all.